Unbelievable. that it had been only 3 weeks in this university taking architecture course and i've already labelled it as torturing. it's not because i hate this course. i love it very much that i can bear it till now, even though we're absolutely lack of sleep and eat recently. it's that... something just wrong with this place that im learning. the system... so stressing.
I know that some of my friends who currently taking this course are gonna leave it. away from architecture. i know how they feel. but it's totally making me sad. i'm in an uncontrollable emotion now, going up and down drastically. yet when some of them are leaving, i'm feeling hopeless. but i'm not weak. i could do it by myself inshaa Allah. i'm a strong mama's daughter. :')
unpleasant rumors about this life that i'm going through, it's increasing from day to day. i heard it. even though i don't wanna to. because these kind of rumors just killing me day to day. i just wanna put earphone on both ears and max the volume. i don't wanna hear anything more! i wanna proceed with my passion. my hurtful passion.
this sounds so pathetic isn't it. only Allah knows how it feels. only Allah knows how much i changed since the commencement in this institution. no matter what others said, how bad this system is, how lifeless this architecture would be, i wanna stay. because i believe, if we do something diligently with sincerity, with the aim to please Allah, He will definitely help us. the key is PATIENT.