Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Go to the place where i belong to

I'm getting tired. Of living like this.
Deep in my heart, I really want to live my life back to basic.
Living in a village, belajar buat kuih tradisional, masakan tradisional.
Hidup macam zaman Opah dulu.
No socmed, no smartphone.
Live basic.
Belajar balik ilmu akidah, tasawuf, bertalaqqi Al-quran tiap hari.
Indahnya.

Can we turn back time?
No.
But we still have time,
to change. To have what we want. Really want in our life.

May Allah always guide us towards His Love & Love towards our Prophet Muhammad S.a.w.
May He strengthen our iman, always.

Thursday, May 24, 2018

Malaysia Baru Mei 2018

Alhamdulillah,

Actually, I've never felt as happy as that day.
10th of May 2018.
It marks the end & also the beginning of new era.
Where Malaysia could finally start it all over again, after so many corruptions in around the country itself.
There was time where I planned to migrate to other country for betterment in my lifestyle, because that time, I was too much overwhelmed with my life. I feel like want to start it fresh where I could develop myself without people around me knowing me. It did happened.

Being in certain place for too long really affect my mental health. I mean, Our. Each of us. Yet what makes us keep on moving forward throughout the rough days is our own self. We decide, to keep moving on or to give up. Giving up is always easy right? And it's kinda not fun (?) But we still need to know in which point to keep on moving in the same path or take some time to move onto new things in life.

I'm glad that now, it's different.
After 24 years of living in this blissful heterogeneous country.

When the new government rules, means, there is a chance for change. For better Malaysia.

I thought I have plenty of ideas to be wrote this time. But then it ends here.
Maybe it's meant to be shared with someone special (?) Eventho idk yet who's that person. tathaa!

Sunday, May 6, 2018

Hiatus.

Overwhelming insecure, overthinking.

Lately i feel like in need of some kind of short break from everything around me, starting from the working lifestyle to my own businesses. I try to busy myself doing everything just to forget about something, but yet, i can't even focus properly for each of them. Doing freelance sketching, agent for korean skincare products, managing a startup, even having a stable job.

I need to give myself space to rearrange everything. Everything seems to be miserable and not in place. I need to spot, where did it goes wrong. Why I can't chill myself when supposedly i am in a very comfort zone.

Taking MCs just to ask the doctor, what's wrong with me, but still. I cant find the answer. Been given the prescription for daily dosage, but it worsen.
Seems like only me, knows what happen to me.

Yeah sometimes, i need to talk to myself back. Ask myself properly, why.  What is that blank space inside me? Why I feel life is not so fulfilling when everything seems Okay ?


Sincerely,

Confused Jannah 6th May 2018.