while sitting solely without thinking of anything
in the sudden it came
the unforgettable moment of despair
when this brain can't be controlled properly
always hunting for world's entertainment
longing for friends' attention
how lucky the children who were raised
with very proper and perfect teachings
they learnt to memorize the Holy Quran since 3 years old
they were taught to cover their aurah even when they're still crawling
their manners were always under control
to avoid them astray
and also apart themselves from the wrongdoers
not meant to blame how my parents took care of me
they're very wonderful
helpful and always tell us to do good deeds
they never concerned of how much money and effort they gave
as long as all of us live happily and in normal condition..
doing things that i shouldn't did
when i was in my primary and secondary school
things that Islam taught us not to
to crave for something unimportant
to be ungrateful of what i had
to befriend with those whom shouldn't be closed to
how much black dots clung to this fragile heart
only Allah knows.
the past keeps haunting
even though it is unrepeatable
it'll never be eased easily from the hippocampus
cause it's permanent
and always reminds how fool we were
on the past.
only one thing for sure
Allah is Forgiving
He will guide us
as long as we repent
and never have desire to do the same mistakes
indeed, He is Caring
and never want us to seek bad things
may this feel of guilt and repentance last forever..
may Allah always light us with Hidayah
and make these tiny hearts aware of sinful deeds
aamiiin. ya rabbal a'lamiin.
make Allah سبحانه و تعالى as a vision
Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم as an exemplary
and Islam as the way of life.
inshaa Allah we'll find the safest path through afterlife.